I Don't Love You

by 21stcenturymummy on August 4, 2010

I’m feeling very unloved.

“I don’t love you Mummy” is my beautiful 2 year old’s not so beautiful phrase of moment. It’s sometimes interspersed with a slightly less cutting “I don’t like you”. It makes me want throw myself onto the floor in a sobbing heap. I have a feeling like I’m getting a glimpse of what she’ll be like as a teenager. Help!

I don’t know why she is so fixated with saying this, I can only assume this is a normal phase for children to go through. Anyone? She actually a very sweet, good-natured little girl.

It’s hard not to take it personally and feel heart-broken, even though you know they don’t really mean it, especially if you’ve had a bad day and all you hear from them is “I don’t love you”. I’ve got a feeling it will be a thousand times worse when she is a teenager and “I hate you” or worse comes out, but she does mean it.

{ 20 comments }

Naomi Richards August 4, 2010 at 12:58 pm

My 3 year old currently tells me he loves daddy more. I personally do not think he does know what he is saying because I know he adores me. Daddy is a novelty and chidlren love novelties. When you are there all the time they take you fro granted – sign of things to come! – dont let it affect your ego.

21stcenturymummy August 4, 2010 at 1:35 pm

Oh yes Daddy is definitely flavour of the month at the moment. I went away for the weekend and I’m still being punished 😉

Naomi Richards August 4, 2010 at 12:58 pm

My 3 year old currently tells me he loves daddy more. I personally do not think he does know what he is saying because I know he adores me. Daddy is a novelty and chidlren love novelties. When you are there all the time they take you fro granted – sign of things to come! – dont let it affect your ego.

21stcenturymummy August 4, 2010 at 1:35 pm

Oh yes Daddy is definitely flavour of the month at the moment. I went away for the weekend and I’m still being punished 😉

Mummy's Little Monkey August 5, 2010 at 8:23 am

Kids! My OH is allowed to go away to the Golf for a week and the little one doesn’t bat an eyelid. But if I don’t see her for the whole day (like when I went to Cybermummy, and Daddy took her to stay overnight at Nanny’s) I’m given the cold shoulder for days on end!!!!! Ungrateful sods… :)

Mummy's Little Monkey August 5, 2010 at 8:23 am

Kids! My OH is allowed to go away to the Golf for a week and the little one doesn’t bat an eyelid. But if I don’t see her for the whole day (like when I went to Cybermummy, and Daddy took her to stay overnight at Nanny’s) I’m given the cold shoulder for days on end!!!!! Ungrateful sods… :)

family vie August 5, 2010 at 8:28 am

My 2 yr old ran away from me the other day, right across the park and near to a road. I had no choice but to abandon his brother in the pram, kick my flip flops off and run after him. When I reached him I was half shouting, half in tears. He looked at me with interest and said ‘Oh I make mummy cry’. He seemed very pleased with himself.

family vie August 5, 2010 at 8:28 am

My 2 yr old ran away from me the other day, right across the park and near to a road. I had no choice but to abandon his brother in the pram, kick my flip flops off and run after him. When I reached him I was half shouting, half in tears. He looked at me with interest and said ‘Oh I make mummy cry’. He seemed very pleased with himself.

(mostly) yummy mummy August 5, 2010 at 9:10 am

Oh I feel your heartbreak honestly! My 2yo says to me all of the the time ‘I don’t love you Mama, I love my Dada’
I’m sure they can’t mean it, but it still hurts xx

(mostly) yummy mummy August 5, 2010 at 9:10 am

Oh I feel your heartbreak honestly! My 2yo says to me all of the the time ‘I don’t love you Mama, I love my Dada’
I’m sure they can’t mean it, but it still hurts xx

A Modern Military Mother August 5, 2010 at 11:33 am

We think that it’s all about us but with kids it’s all about them. They don’t know what the words they are using mean and really they just want you to do whatever they want you to do when they want you to do and this is them expressing their frustration because you are out of their control. It’s the beginning of the battle that will rage until they become adults. These words are the weapons that they use to break you. Be like BatFink – my wings are like a shield of steel!

21stcenturymummy August 5, 2010 at 2:28 pm

Activating Batfink wings. They’re a little rusty, will clean them up so they are nice and sparkly.

A Modern Military Mother August 5, 2010 at 11:33 am

We think that it’s all about us but with kids it’s all about them. They don’t know what the words they are using mean and really they just want you to do whatever they want you to do when they want you to do and this is them expressing their frustration because you are out of their control. It’s the beginning of the battle that will rage until they become adults. These words are the weapons that they use to break you. Be like BatFink – my wings are like a shield of steel!

21stcenturymummy August 5, 2010 at 2:28 pm

Activating Batfink wings. They’re a little rusty, will clean them up so they are nice and sparkly.

rachel August 5, 2010 at 7:28 pm

Mate, B’s latest is “I want my sob my sob sob d-d-d-daddyyyyyyyyyyyy……I w-want m-m-my daaaaddyyyy….”
Wouldn’t mind, but the fool AWOL! We ain’t seen sight nor sound of him since March 2007.

21stcenturymummy August 6, 2010 at 9:28 pm

That must make you feel sad :(

rachel August 5, 2010 at 7:28 pm

Mate, B’s latest is “I want my sob my sob sob d-d-d-daddyyyyyyyyyyyy……I w-want m-m-my daaaaddyyyy….”
Wouldn’t mind, but the fool AWOL! We ain’t seen sight nor sound of him since March 2007.

21stcenturymummy August 6, 2010 at 9:28 pm

That must make you feel sad :(

Planethalder August 8, 2010 at 12:09 pm

My 2.2 year old doesn’t necessarily single me out – her dad and two Grandmas are also the victims of her periodic, alacritic “Don’t look at me, GO AWAY, mummy/daddy/grandma!!” She only started saying this once she turned two.

Planethalder August 8, 2010 at 12:09 pm

My 2.2 year old doesn’t necessarily single me out – her dad and two Grandmas are also the victims of her periodic, alacritic “Don’t look at me, GO AWAY, mummy/daddy/grandma!!” She only started saying this once she turned two.

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